We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are – Anais Nin
Everyone possesses a thought system that is unique, made up of our own past experiences and our genetic make up. Our parents, our backgrounds, interpretations, memory, selective perception and circumstances all influence our thought systems. No two thought systems are alike and this means that they way experience life will be different for everyone. Two people could have the exact same experience yet take away something different from that event.
When we accept that everyone will see things differently, it minimises the chance for conflict. It also helps to reduce mind reading. This is where we make assumptions about what others are thinking. This is a dangerous thing to do as we never truly know what others are thinking unless we ask them directly.
If someone isn’t as friendly as we’d like, we may begin wondering why they behaved in a certain way, we make assumptions. Often this overthinking can cause more anxiety and trouble than it’s worth. We base assumptions on no real evidence.
It is important to remember that we will assume others think the way we do and this can often involve our own insecurities. If we worry about being abandoned or not loved enough, we will interpret someone else’s behaviour in terms of our own thought system. When we learn to let go of mind reading, we free up our mental energy for more productive, happier thoughts.
We can never know what others are thinking and trying to solve this without asking directly can lead to misery. Remember we all live in slightly different realities, make lee way for this and you will be happier for it.