Before you get married, preparing for your big day is one thing, but preparing how best you will live as a couple requires that you put in a lot of effort. It’s a lot easier to believe that couples will have an easy road from the yes in their proposal. But, if they don’t take their marriage preparation as serious as their wedding plans, they may just have to face the reality that marriage isn’t a smooth ride.
To make sure that you don’t struggle in your marriage, here are a few important considerations to take note of before getting married.
Go for Pre-Marriage Counseling
Pre-marriage counseling is among the essential things to consider before getting married that many people tend to overlook. Many couples who are about to get married aren’t sure of what they should talk about before getting married. With pre-marriage counseling, such couples are better positioned to get better insights into the types of challenges they may end facing after their wedding.
During the counseling sessions, a marriage counselor can help couples to gain better insights on aspects such as conflict resolution and money management.
A counselor can still help both of you understand your desires and expectations, and this is a great way you can share your thoughts on divorce, sex, and children. As you are going through the different dynamics of marriage life, you will be enlightened in different ways to reach agreements on conflicting ideas or goals.
Learn to Understand Each Other’s Core Values
Before you finally decide that you are going to live the rest of your lives together, you should discuss what your individual beliefs and values are. They may range from politics to family dynamics and religion. There are plenty of issues you may not end up agreeing, but it’s essential that you always respect each other’s viewpoints.
Every partnership goes through conflict at some point in their marriage life, but their resolution will have to take both parties’ effort to get to the cause of the problem and resolve it amicably.
Figure Out How to Manage Your Finances
Finances are one of the important topics that couples have to be on the same speaking terms. Conflicts related to financial challenges are a primary source of fight, especially for those in defacto relationships because it stems from different things, including trust, power, and control. In the course of your relationship, you are bound to go through family emergencies, and you must have a discussion with your spouse to figure out how you can cope with such an issue.
It is also important that you are also financially cautious. Be on the same page on how much you are willing to spend on certain items at home. If you had a debt, you should also come with a repayment plan when you get married.
While there are plenty of marriage myths surrounding what you should and shouldn’t do before marriage, it’s important to get pre-marriage counseling. These types of sessions come in handy in helping you figure out how best you can handle different aspects of your marriage life, including your finances, personal goals, and raising children.
Photo by Jed Villejo on Unsplash
Author: Mandy Kloppers
Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.
