6 ways to live a happy life
Don’t take things personally
We are egocentric beings which means that we tend to interpret neutral events according to our own personal influences and ideas. We all have existing biases that underlie our perceptions of the world. As a result we tend to think that other people’s behaviour is somehow aimed at us or that we have somehow caused them to behave in a certain way. One of the fundamental keys to being happy is to learn not to personalise other people’s behaviour.
There could be a number of other reasons as to why someone seemed to ignore you, or appeared to act angrily towards you and believe it or not, these reasons could have very little to do with you. Cut yourself some slack and give yourself the benefit of the doubt. “Act dumb” – if no one tells you there is a problem, assume everything is just fine and dandy.
Be adaptable and flexible
The more you can embrace change and the lack of certainty in life, the better off you’ll be in the happiness stakes. The more rigid your rules about life are, the more often they will be broken. Learn to go with the flow sometimes and you will find that you will ‘bob’ along the waves and ups of downs of life quite nicely instead of exhausting yourself trying to stop the waves coming.
Don’t over think
Over thinking can lead to faulty assumptions and we end up building our own stories upon things that didn’t even exist to begin with. Whilst it’s important to be self aware and have a general purpose in life, it’s a very bad idea to spend too much time in your head. Worry is generally unproductive unless it is resolution focused. If you are wondering why someone said something or whether something will happen in the future, remember that the only thing certain is the moment right now. Learn to live and take action rather than living in your head endlessly where anxious thoughts are bound to creep in unnecessarily.
Believe in your own abilities to get through tough times
Have courage and faith in your own ideas – never let others dilute your resolve. Others can be negative and can end up a source of anxiety in your life. Remember that they don’t always know more than you do, they just might be more persuasive and manipulative though. Trust your instincts. If I listen to my own advice, I am taking responsibility for my own decisions. If I take someone else’s advice and it doesn’t work out, I may end up resenting them and feeling worse. Believe in your own ideas and know that you are much wiser than you probably give yourself credit for.
Life a life with integrity
When you live a life according to your values, it is much easier to like the person staring back at you in the mirror. For me this means being kind and not gossiping about others behind their backs. I dislike two-faced people and would much rather someone told me what they felt to my face even if I didn’t like what they had to say. Be the same person no matter whose company you are in. When we stick to our core values, we develop a strong inner core that helps us feel strength and stability when things around us seem not to be constant.
Be true to yourself
This involves being assertive when you need to be. It doesn’t involve over indulgent people-pleasing. Follow your heart and live the life you were meant to lead. We all have a calling in life but sometimes we never really listen to what that is.The more you feel you are living life to your true potential the happier you will be.
The above 6 ideas are a great start to recapturing that illusive thing called happiness. Happiness comes when you are living the life you want and appreciating what you have, not chasing the one you think is still out there.
Mandy X
Author: Mandy Kloppers
Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.
