Are you a kind person?

I like to think that we all want to be kind to others. Even the harshest of people still have a glimmer of kindness underneath their hard exterior. Sometimes it needs coaxing out because they have had to be hard to survive. Life is tough at times and we tend to find ways to protect ourselves from cruelty and punishment from others.

I have worked with clients who had very difficult upbringings, some have become hardened and show a tough exterior. Others have somehow managed to hang on to being kind and still giving to others.

I have often wondered what the difference is between these two types of people. Some of us juts need to be shown kindness in order for us to be able to access it within ourselves. The more kindness we show to others, the more able they are to find it within themselves.

Are you a kind person? Do you do things for others even though you don’t have to? I have always thought blood donors were the ultimate when it comes to acts of kindness. They do this wonderful thing for strangers and there is absolutely no benefit to them apart from possibly feeling they are doing a good deed.

Being kind to others increases our own self esteem and actually makes us happier people. I am convinced that the world is becomer a kinder, more caring place. Look at the spread of veganism – complete empathy for animals and the understanding of how it must be to suffer and not have a voice to speak out against it.

I automatically feel warmth towards strangers when I witness them doing kind deeds for others and for animals. That warm fuzzy feeling feels good and I want more of it.

Kindness in therapy is also a new concept. Showing kindness spreads good energy around the world. Think of the movie “pay it forward”. A wonderful story about spreading kindness (see below).

I would love to see a mexican wave of kindness go around the globe. It’s easier now too with social media to bring about mass changes in our levels of kindness and care. When therapists display something called “pro-social modelling”, they help clients experience kind behaviour, possibly something they may never have experienced in their childhoods. Therapists can help rebuild self love and acceptance for clients by treating them with kindness and consideration. Through behaving in this way, therapists teach clients how to respond to kindess and how to give it as well.

I am not naive though, there will always be an “us and them” mentality. Psychologists have seen this since the beginning of their studies but when we take time to understand the “why” instead of judging in black and white terms, we may just be able to find extra tolerance for others. Collaboration, support and understanding will lead to a far better world than blame and judgement ever could.

I don’t care if I look weird or stupid if I compliment a stranger or smile at someone when they aren’t expecting it. It’s my little way of expressing positive energy. The world is full of vibrations and I believe that kindness is one of those vibrations.

Have you ever met someone who seems to ooze warmth and kindness? I believe they give off signs, they have a special energy. The kinder we are, the more we glow. It’s a nice thought.

Go out of your way for someone now and then. Help those less forutnate than yourself and always try to lend a helping hand if you are able to. If we all made an effort to contribute in some small ways, imagine how we could improve goodwill towards each other.

I also want to send out a special thanks to all those heroes out there who do show kindess and care when they don’t need to. You are special. Thank you!

Mandy X

Author: Mandy Kloppers

Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.