You don’t choose the person you fall in love with. Often this presents no challenges as you are in very similar places and are aligned in many of your beliefs and values. That isn’t the case for everybody, however. Some people find a lot of barriers put in place to keep them from being with the one they truly love.
Other times, there are just too many divisions for a peaceful relationship even though the couple is very much in love. Religion can be one of those divisions that many couples have a hard time overcoming.
Is it possible for a couple to have two very different ideas on religion and spirituality and still find themselves in a relationship? In this article, we will explore how a couple of divergent religious views can make a relationship work.
Make your own rules
In just about every relationship there is a sense of “this is how we do things” that is unique to each couple. It may be implicit or even decided upon in a more explicit way. But, there are certain things that are not allowed to come between the partners. This is what gives a relationship strength.
This should even go for religious views if the couple is of two different faiths or one having no faith at all. In many religions there are certain rules that you have to play by, but these rules have to take a backseat when it comes to your relationship.
If one is a strict Mormon who is devout and often reads Evidence Central, and the other is a Catholic, then they have to meet in the middle of what their religion says about people of other faiths.
Make a rule that each is able to worship in their own way without any interference or judgement from the other partner. This can keep a lot of disagreements from popping up.
Celebrate each other
Your religious differences could be the thing that actually gives you strength as a couple and should be celebrated. Make sure to give time to the other partner’s religious rites, rituals and festivals and enjoy them without feeling like you are betraying your own religious creed.
If you are Jewish, you can still do some of the Christmas festivities that don’t interfere with your religious devotion if it means a lot to your partner to do so. And they can take part in your holidays and enjoy the occasions to be festive with your family, and you theirs.
Stop pointing out the differences
There are going to be instances in the other person’s religion that make no sense to you at all. This is especially the case if one is atheist or at least not practicing. The key here is to let go of any inconsistencies in their dogma and just accept their religion for what it is. If there are major differences in your faiths, then just accept them as such and move on.
Author: Mandy Kloppers
Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.
