Suffering usually relates to wanting things to be different from the way they are.
• Allan Lokos, Pocket Peace: Effective Practices for Enlightened Living
Most of us are chasing the wrong things. We think the bigger car, the fatter bank balance or the extra holidays will provide the fulfillment and peace of mind we seek. This is a modern day myth. Whilst material trappings certainly make life easier, they do not provide long term emotional fulfillment. Once you have the bigger house or car, the pleasure associated with this newly acquired possession diminishes and each time we spoil ourselves, we need a bigger hit the next time.
Once you have driven round in the new sports car for a while, the initial thrill recedes. The same goes for new clothing, a new home or any other possessions.
I am not saying that one does not continue to appreciate a beautiful big house, but it is human nature to become complacent. A person living in a mansion doesn’t spend a large proportion of their day thinking how lucky they are to be living there – they may do initially but then their attention will turn to other things, such as why the neighbor was rude that morning or whether the tax man is going to come knocking.
As the saying goes – no matter how hard we try the world will never be perfect.
What I am trying to get at, is that – happiness is an inside job. As long as we have the basics in life – food, shelter and so on, we are in a very good place to receive inner contentment.
Try the following tips:
Practice gratitude – focus on what is good in your life
Mindfulness – live in the moment, it is all we have
Priorities – take pleasure in the small things
Spend time with friends and family – nurture your relationships
Have a sense of meaning and purpose – give back to others in some way.
M x
All names have been changed to protect the identity of clients. Personal client stories shared in this blog have been published with prior permission from the relevant clients.
Author: Mandy Kloppers
Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.
