Open-minded and tolerant
Sometimes, we want to believe in someone so badly that we make ourselves believe what they are telling us. Even though our instincts are telling us otherwise, we ignore our inner wisdom in favour of the promise of love and happiness.
All too often I meet clients who say ” Now, looking back..I can’t believe I was so stupid…” ..or  “why didn’t I see the signs?”
Don’t let this happen to you. If someone loves you they will show you. Nine times out of ten they will come through for you. Mishaps occur and no one can be 100% reliable but when someone constantly contradicts themselves and seems to be saying one thing and doing another- be wary.
In the process of getting to know someone, we have to adopt an “innocent till proven guilty” approach and keep an open mind. Trust is a risk but it can be so worthwhile when your trust is protected and respected.
Manipulation
Be aware of narcissists – it is always about them and their primary motive is to please themselves. They will give you just enough positive feedback to keep you hanging in there and you will tear your hair out by second-guessing them all the time..do they care? don’t they care? what did they mean by saying that?
If it doesn’t fit, it probably isn’t meant to be. Relationships should not constantly be hard work. Hang in there when the going gets tough but if the tough times never end it’s time to rethink.
Don’t settle. Life is too short. Don’t allow fear to keep you where you are. You will be limiting your opportunities by doing this – there’s a whole wide world out there..so much to discover. Don’t stay in that tiny, unhappy place…get out and see what’s out there. You will look back and be so glad you did.
Mandy X
Author: Mandy Kloppers
Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.
