Rebuilding a broken relationship
Relationships are delicate in nature and can be very easily broken. These precious relationships have to go a long way before they become strong enough to last a lifetime. But when the time comes, these relationships fall apart into pieces because of certain simple mistakes that people often do unknowingly.
1 Do set your egos aside for once
In a few cases, it might happen that one party may have been wrong from the start but you cannot hope to argue with them in every case, sometimes you might need to hold back and let the other person save face and make up for his mistake. But if you cannot trust them ever again then it’s better not to try this method at all. Check Rock Solid Relation to learn more about how you can get rid of your egos in your relationships and have the time of your life!
2 Be open about your feelings
It’s always better if we keep our problems hidden, but this is one of the basic mistakes that most people make. Holding back your feelings will make you stress out which can be hard to control for your partner as well. If both parties know what they are going through, together you might come up with a solution.
3 Don’t go on about the mistakes you have made
It’s always better to admit your mistake first before trying to prove yourself right, whenever someone blames their partner it just breaks down the relationship even further making everything worse. So if you want your relationship to get better then let them have their say without interrupting them and keep quiet till they are finished.
4 Never expect your partner to read your mind
Learn to communicate what you feel instead of expecting people to read between the lines all the time. Communicating clearly might take a lot out of you, but it will help you save yourself from further pain and torture that might come into being if you don’t talk honestly about whatever is bothering you at that particular moment.
5 Fight fair
Whenever you are in an argument make sure to never bring up past mistakes or incidents. Keep your arguments to the current matter at hand and don’t drag it out too much. It’s always better when things remain in context.
6 Try not to let little fights escalate into huge ones
If there is a fight, then try to resolve it that very minute before letting it wear on you for days on end. If you sense that the fight will get bigger if it continues, then ask yourself whether you should keep fighting about something like this or just walk away from the situation so that neither of you gets hurt any more than what is already happening. Remember whatever has happened cannot be changed but whatever might happen can always be prevented.
7 Be forgiving when the other person messes up
No one in this world is perfect, everyone makes mistakes that’s a given fact. So do not punish your partner for every little mistake by reminding them of their past actions all the time. Instead, forgive and forget and move on from there. If you punish someone for their mistakes then it will lead to a long-lasting hatred towards each other which can be even more damaging than before.
8 Never go to bed mad
Whenever you have a fight with your partner, never sleep thinking about what they did wrong because it will just distract you from whatever you were supposed to do the next day at work or school or anything else that needs attention. However, if you are still hurt by what they did then it’s better you talk about it before going to bed, this way both of you will be able to resolve the fight and stay peaceful throughout the night.
9 Don’t keep reminding your partner of their mistakes
It is good that you hold your partner accountable for whatever mistakes that they have done, but after they have apologized for their action do not continue reminding them every day about how bad it was. Be forgiving and make sure you move on together as one without any more guilt or remorse towards each other.
10 Limit communication during fights
Whenever there is an argument between the two parties do not feel obliged to answer a call or a text from them because this might only fuel the fire more, instead you should make the effort to contact them once things have simmered down.
11 Make an effort to keep your relationship alive
Try not to let little fights break the chain of life between you and your partner because after a certain time everything can change so give each other enough space so that the two of you can see what’s really going on. If there is love still present in both hearts then no matter how long it takes they will come back with open arms just as before. So never neglect or abandon someone that matters a lot to you because if you do then they might just start believing that this is what they’re supposed to be feeling all along.
12 Trying new things together
The best relationships are the ones where both the partners share a lot of common interests. For example, if you have a passion for rock climbing and so does your partner, then go ahead with them once in a while to enjoy an adventure-filled weekend together. This will help you bond on a more personal level with each other apart from just living through the day-to-day activities. So try out new things that seem interesting to you both as a couple even it’s something small.
13 Communicate better with your loved one
The most important aspect of any happy relationship is communication, without which the foundation of the relationship will start cracking until everything else fails completely. Always remember that communication goes two ways therefore make sure to talk about your feelings and thoughts with your partner, don’t let it get bottled up inside of you because that will only make things more difficult for both of you later on.
14 Try to enjoy the time spent together
It’s not necessary that every second of your time spent together has to be enjoyable or fun-filled but try enjoying at least a few moments from each day with him/her no matter how difficult it gets. Because sometimes when everything is going wrong in a relationship staying happy for at least a few minutes can keep you going until the storm passes by. Also never complain about spending time together because this will only add fuel to the fire making things even worse than before.
15 Do not give up easily on love
If you truly love someone and you feel they’re the right match for you then never ever give up on them until you know for sure that this is not what they want anymore. It is always better to keep trying until you find a way to fix things together than just abandoning everything.
16 Take time out
If there has been too much fighting between the two of you recently and no matter how hard both of you try things still end up going downhill, then taking some time alone from each other will help solve a lot of problems and misunderstandings. So take at least a week or so to spend time thinking about what went wrong and how you can put it all behind you. Remember, you have the option to go exploring new things with other people so going on a short trip together will help your partner know that he/she is still important to you even though things are not working out right now.
17 Spend more time together
Sometimes simply being around each other can work wonders for any relationship because just being by his/her side even when they’re doing something boring can show them that there is no one else in the world you would rather be with than them. So try and do things like attending public gatherings together and make an effort to go to places where both of you enjoy hanging around even if it means just sitting together having your own time apart from other people.
18 Keep yourself happy
If you are in a bad relationship whether physically, mentally, or emotionally then try to make sure that you are not adding fuel to the fire by being negative all day about everything. So if things are really bad take some time out for yourself and be alone doing whatever it is you love until you can figure out what’s best for both of you. Also never let anything that happens between the two of you affect your psychological health because then it will become even more difficult to find a solution that works best to solve everything.
19 Let them know they matter very much to you
Sometimes your partner might feel like there is no point in continuing the relationship because it’s no longer like how it used to be in the beginning when everything was perfect. So remind them of all the good times you had together and even though it might seem cheesy give them compliments to make them feel special and loved because sometimes your partner might stop feeling that they are appreciated by their loved one after a certain time this is when they start thinking about finding someone else or breaking up completely instead try keeping yourself interested in each other to keep things interesting.
20 Try to understand why your partner wants space
If at one point during an argument your partner asked for some alone time then think of a reason why they would want that before approaching any topic with him/her. Sometimes taking a step back from a relationship shows that there is something wrong and it’s better to figure out what it might be before trying to patch things up with your partner.
21 Make sure you actually want to fix things
Before approaching your partner with an idea or proposal for fixing the relationship make sure that you yourself are willing to do whatever it takes because what might work out for one person might not necessarily work out for another and vice versa, therefore by making sure that both of you actually want to come back together will only help keep both sets of egos intact and then there is always a better chance of things working out between the two of you.
Author: Mandy Kloppers
Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.
