life Mandy Kloppers

Emotional resilience in life

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We all need to find ways to minimise the impact from the negatives in life –
such as taxes, traffic, queues, corrupt politicians, rejection from others..the list goes on

So how do we maximise our internal shock absorbers in order to protect ourselves?

A lot of it comes down to the way in which we think about what happens to us. The more flexible we are the better for us.

Research has shown that optimists tend to have happier lives because of the way they think: The way you reason with yourself about things that happen to you has a huge impact on your success – no matter where you are – work, school, home etc.
Pessimists are up to 8 times more likely to become depressed when bad events occur, they do worse at school, sports and most jobs than their talents would suggest.
The good news is that optimism is a learned behaviour. Optimists tend to attribute success to themselves and failure to external factors more than the average person does. This is called buffering – minimising the impact and it works.
Pessimists catastrophise and see things as permanent, optimists look at bad events as being temporary. They never lose sight of hope.
Optimists ride out their success and make the most of it. Pessimists downplay their successes and focus on what isn’t right.
Do you do this? If you don’t give yourself credit for a job well done, ask yourself why you don’ deserve to pat yourself on the back!!

When it comes to rejection, a pessimist will decide that they are generally unacceptable whereas an optimist will see it as only being rejected by that one person.
It’s all down to thinking.
Always ask yourself – what can I tell myself or how can I think about this situation that will make me feel less upset??
It’s an important question, I use it all the time and it makes the world of difference…

Mandy X

Mandy Kloppers
Author: Mandy Kloppers

Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.