Feeling alone in a busy overpopulated world

The irony is that, if you ever feel alone despite being in the company of others and despite the fact that the planet is crammed full of people – you’re not alone. Many clients tell me how they feel less connected than ever.

I believe this is due to the fact that there is pressure to “keep up appearances”. People go through the motions of asking others how they are, expecting the same response – “I’m fine”. Funny thing is…more often than not, we’re not completely fine. We’re annoyed with our partner, we have financial worries or we’ve eaten far too many bags of crisps that day and self loathing has set in. Whatever the underlying reason, what I am trying to get at is that there is a disconnect emerging between what we feel inside and what we show on the outside. This is how we end up feeling lonely.

We only show part of ourselves and the hidden part never feels fully accepted. It’s as if there is a vulnerable scared side that we have to hide. Plaster that smile on and get on with it – it seems no one really cares, or at least it can seem this way.

I get to see the hidden side that people feel they can’t show in other areas of their life. It’s a sad fact of life that we can’t all just be more open with each other. Those clients who have decided to be brave and stop hiding parts of themselves that they feel are unwelcome are often pleasantly surprised at the responses they get.

The truth is that we all have our own ‘cross’ to bear, everyone has had some hard times in their life…I just wish we could share with each other more. There is no shame in admitting to being human. In fact, showing vulnerability shows others that we are human and can make us seem more approachable.

Learn to connect with others, show a little more of the vulnerable you that never gets out. You might just be amazed at the warmth and kindness that comes your way.

Mandy X

Author: Mandy Kloppers

Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.