Spending too much time at a home can cause tensions to rise and we can all end up slightly more irritable. It can be more tricky to keep everyone happy at home and I have come up with some suggestions to maintain harmony at home.
Pick your battles
This is the time for being more selective about what you really want to insist upon. Relaxing the rules at home will reduce conflict. Instead of insisting everyone eats dinner at the dining room table, try to be more flexible and allow family members to sit in the TV room or perhaps let everyone eat at different times. Rules don;t always have to be rigidly adhered to. Decide which rules are non negotiable and relax about the rest to maintain harmony at home. Being authoritarian at home can lead to far more conflict and misery for everyone involved.
Take time out
If you are unable to get out for a break, make sure you take a break – whether that’s a bubble bath or a long shower. You could also go into your bedroom and watch something on your laptop. Some time alone can be all you need to reduce your stress and feel more relaxed. Rate your stress level out of 10 – 10 being the most stressed. if you start to feel you are getting to a 7 or above on the stressed-out scale, try to take some time out. Ideally go for a walk but if this isn’t possible, half an hour or so away from the rest of the family might be all that you need.
Stop and think
This is always good advice. Stop and think before you react. Take a deep breath – go to the loo.. do whateber you need to, to create pause between the trigger and your reaction. When we are triggered, out immediate stress response is triggered in the brain (the hypothalamus and amygdala) – this is our instinctive reaction and there is very little rational thought in this reaction. if you give a little bit longer, your frontal cortex gets intio gear and will help you to recat in a more considered, rational way. Stop and count to ten or take 10 deep breaths…pause before taking action.
Do fun things together
Instead of conflict, introduce fun things to do to improve family cohesion. Play games together or watch a comedy. There are many creative ways to improve camaraderie at home. Cook together, go for a walk together. Communicate in a positive way and keep criticism and irritability to a minimum to maintain harmony at home.
If you feel that you have more serious issues at home, it may be time to look into counselling or family therapy to get to the heart of the issues. Look after your family, theyy should be your nearest and dearest.
Mandy X
Photo by Pablo Merchán Montes on Unsplash
Author: Mandy Kloppers
Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.
