Everyone experiences anger—it’s a completely normal emotion, and it’s healthy within limits. But as we know, anger can become a problem when it gets out of control. How you think about a situation can influence how you feel about it. For example, if you
think that someone “has it out for you”, you will probably see all of their actions in a negative light. Can you think of a time when your thoughts affected your anger? In what ways could changing how you think help you control how you feel?
Anger often masks deep-rooted emotions that have been suppressed such as: anxiety, fear, loss, trauma, frustration, feeling helpless, being bullied, feeling you have no control, embarrassed, lonely, humiliated, grief, guilt, shame
grounding techniques
identify warning signs
what are the underlying causes?
Suppressed anything, denial, distraction – anger stays in the body. Inner pressure.
Some people describe anger as a “secondary emotion”. This means that anger is a response
to a primary emotion, such as hurt, fear, or sadness. For example, someone might feel hurt,
and lash out with anger in response. Do you think anger is a secondary emotion? Why or
why not
Learned behaviour?
Many of us pick up life-long habits related to anger when we’re children, based off of the
examples set by our parents. Do you notice any similarities between how you and your
family members deal with anger? What are your family’s strengths and weaknesses in
dealing with anger?
How you think about a situation can influence how you feel about it. For example, if you
think that someone “has it out for you”, you will probably see all of their actions in a negative
light. Can you think of a time when your thoughts affected your anger? In what ways could
changing how you think help you control how you feel?
What to do
Grounding techniques
Be aware of triggers
Use diversions
Take time out
Photo by Afif Kusuma on Unsplash
Author: Mandy Kloppers
Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.
