Life is too short to spend it doing things that hurt you upset you, make you mad or just don’t fit in with your goals and values. When you appreciate that life is too short, you could make less time for the following:
Spending time with toxic people
Toxic people tend to be judgemental, bitter and angry. They will judge you and belittle you at times. Whatever it is that they do, look out for that feeling of being emotionally drained after spending time with them. Of course, if you have a friend going through a tough time, they may temporarily be emotionally draining but comforting and supporting them is what a good friend would do. I am referring to a long standing pattern of toxicity where they judge you and make you feel bad about yourselfm even if it is very subtle. Life is too short for this kind of perosn – cut them out completely or at least limit your time with them otherwise they will -bring -you -down.
Doing things you hate
Okay, so we all have to do stuff we hate at times. I hated school with a passion but I needed to attend to get to where I wanted to be. Unfortunately, some stuff we just have to grin and bear. But when you have a choice, ask yourself why you keep wasting precious moments doing something that you actually don’t enjoy one bit.
Are you in a job that you hate? If it’s been going on for more than 4 months it’s time to question why you are still there and not looking at alternative options
If you are doing things you hate purely to please someone else – that can be healthy to an extent as long as it’s give and take. If you do all the giving anf the sacrificing – it’s time to redress the balance. You don’t have to accept the status quo. Speak up.
Worrying too much
Yes, I know it’s easier said than done. But worrying doesn’t keep you safe it just keeps you miserable. Every minute you spend worrying is a minute of peace and/or comfort lost. The end result is the same so try to worry less and problem solve more. Focus on what you can change and get stuck in but learn to let go of what you can;t change, Always try to keep your sense of humour and never take this crazy life too seriously.
People pleasing
As I mentioned before, some people pleasing is inevitable, especially if we care about others but don’t spend yur whol life trying to be what you thik others want you to be. That’s far too exhausting. Try to be yourself – there will be those who love you just as you are but you will never find them if you fake it.
Comparing yourself to others
This is just waste energy. Compare yourself now to who you were 5 years ago – look how far you have come. This is healthy. Compating yourself to others is never a good idea. Stop it.
Caring too much about what others think
You will never feel free if you care too much about what others think. Let them think what they want. As long as you feel okay with what you are doing and it isn’t illegal or amoral – go for it!
I am not encouraging you to become a selfish individual but I am suggesting you look at your quality of life and be a bit more ruthless when it comes to how you spend your time.
Mandy X
Photo by Ian Schneider on Unsplash
Author: Mandy Kloppers
Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.
