Ten Important Concepts:

1) Manage Fear/Maintain Perspective

Life is finite. Manage your fears, most of them are in your head and get on with seizing each day as if it were your last. Never allow fear to stop you from trying new things. You will never figure out what you are truly made of if you don’t push yourself out of your comfort zone.

2) Altruism

Happiness cannot come from selfishness. Me, me, me will lead to a lonely, sad life. Be kind and compassionate. Give to others, be generous and spread goodwill around. I truly believe it will come back to you, maybe not in material,possession buts perhaps in more rewarding ways that help you to love and respect yourself.

3) Be open minded and willing to learn/adapt

Try to understand why others do what they do before judging them. Be open minded and know there is always so much more to learn. Knowledge is dynamic and constantly changing… Things we know today may be challenged and turned in their heads in the future, always search and always be curious and remember how little you know right now. Blind certainty is always a sign of ignorance.

4) Gratitude and appreciation

Focus on what is good in life, not constantly on what is missing. The goal posts will keys be changing and there will always be more to have…so where does it end? I have asked many wealthy clients whether they ever say ” yes, I have made it..time to retire in the Bahamas” most of them look at me as if I am crazy and tell me that they never stop and pat themselves on the back. It’ s the next thing they are after, it is never ending and many say once you have money you constantly worry about losing it. That isn’t how I expected wealthy people to live yet it is the reality. Don’t fool yourself by thinking it will all be fine when you have money- big big mistake.

5) Live in the moment more

Enjoy life now in the present. Never put life on hold for some imaginary point/ event in the future. I will be happy when….

Engage your senses in the moment, really enjoy the company you are with, listen to the music, really savour the taste of the food. Learn to put the future and all it’s fears out of your mind more often.

6) Self belief

Believe in yourself.whats the point in putting yourself down and criticising yourself. How is that going to help you? Be your own best friend, get comfortable with complimenting yourself and focusing on the things you love about yourself. The harder you resist this idea, the more you need to be doing it.

7) Balance

It’s all about balance. Yin and yang. Excess is unhealthy. No guilt. Take time out and spoil yourself. It really is okay. Give yourself permission to enjoy life and slow down.It is wrong to believe that achievement leads to happiness. It is the feeling achievement gives you – a sense of self pride. You can give this to yourself without having to accomplish something first.

8) Find your own mission

Drown out the noise of others. What they say, what they do. Others will always judge and try to persuade you to do it their way or to adopt their ideas. You define yourself, no one else. Decide what matters to you and follow it wholeheartedly. It’ is your life after all…. Your life, your decisions

9) Accept uncertainty

Control is an illusion. Learn to accept the unknown and the unfamiliar. Get out of comfort zone. Learn to tolerate uncertainty. Mentally strong people have two characteristics in common – they are able to regulate their emotions and they can tolerate uncertainty. Work in see two skills rather than trying to control others, environment. An impossible task which will ultimately leave you feel even more weak and disempowered. Practise self reliance. See self belief point 6

10) Thinking and quality of life

Learn to challenge and separate fact from thought. Ask yourself whether thinking a certain way is helpful. Is it true? Where is the evidence? We have a lot more choice over what we want to believe yet we often accept our thinking without question. Learn to challenge what you tell yourself. Is it really as you think it is? What would happen if you decided to believe the opposite?

Mandy X

Photo by averie woodard on Unsplash

Author: Mandy Kloppers

Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.