The secret to good mental health

The secret to good mental health is within you. So often, we search outside of ourselves to find direction and purpose but you will never find the right fit for you searching outside of yourself. Sure, you can find inspiration and ideas in the world around you but seeking reassurance, approval and validation has its limits. True fulfilment comes from self-awareness, healthy priorities and living in line with your values.

Shut out the noise

Social media, the news, and the messy world around you serves as a distraction. When you shut out the noise, you focus your energy and it’s easier to identify what you need to feel fulfilled. Purpose can only emerge when you spend time with yourself. I call this ‘Bubble Time’. The secret to good mental health includes healthy boundaries and knowing when to shut the world out for a while.

‘Bubble time’

Bubble time means spending time away from the constant bombardment from social media, the news, others and general information overload. It’s hard to escape from it these days which makes it all the more vital. Bubble time helps you to regenerate, re-assess and regroup. Is your life going the way you desire? Bubble time involves some time alone but Bubble time can also include being with your partner, children etc…Bubble time is where you feel safe and happy. If your family bubble is too busy, then make time for alone bubble time.

Look within for answers

Balance is necessary. It goes without saying that too much bubble time will lead to depression. 60/40 is a good way to share your attention. Living life in Bubble time – 50 or 60 percent, and you are on the right track. Time alone helps you to reconnect with your inner wisdom. The distraction from too much information can easily lead you to follow things that aren’t going to result in self-actualisation. We can easily be persuaded by what others are doing and this can lead to FOMO. Fear of missing out is a myth – if you are in a happy zone, you are definitely NOT missing out.

So many clients spend their lives running around like headless chickens. They get caught up in the “to-do list”mania and pack in so much that they aren’t actually present or mindful. They are going through the motions without a deeper connection to themselves and their intuition shuts down. Don’t be misled. Most people have very little focus and direction. What they think they want doesn’t actually end up satisfying them.

Most of the time, we follow distractions rather than tuning in to what we need and living mindfully. We believe that others know something that we don’t but the truth is this is rare. It’s very seldom that someone else will know what is best for you. You are with yourself for a lifetime so it makes sense to have a healthy approving relationship with yourself.

Photo by Trung Thanh on Unsplash

Trust your instincts

Your instincts are there for a purpose. Have you ever felt awkward around someone or felt a sense of danger when walking down a dark alley? Your instincts communicating with you – tune in and listen. Can you think of how much trouble you might have saved yourself if you have acted on what your instincts told you over the years?

I know my life would be different if I had trusted myself more.

Self-esteem and self-approval for good mental health

The secret to good mental health lies in healthy self-love. The more you like yourself, the less likely it is that you will be persuaded by others. Whether they criticise you and put you down or whether they compliment you. Your relationship with yourself is strong enough to keep your grounded. Knowing your strengths and weaknesses and taking the time to know what makes you happy is the key to feeling content. We are all a work in progress but other’s opinions shouldn’t define you. You define you.

With this strong foundation, you are ready to tackle the busy noisy world and withstand the negativity/manipulation and distraction far better.

Photo by Clint McKoy on Unsplash

Know your values:

When you have a basic idea of your values, it helps define the ‘backbone’ of your life. Values are different from goals,  they are a way of living rather than a place that you arrive at.

Examples of values

Core Values List

So, the bottom line is – trust yourself more. Don’t let fear get the better of you. Focus less on what others say and do and follow your inner wisdom. We all have an inner compass but we forget to tune in as the world gets busier and louder…

Mandy X

If you need support to find your inner wisdom and find direction – contact Mandy for help.

Featured image: Photo by Amanda Lins on Unsplash

Author: Mandy Kloppers

Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.