The problem with beliefs is that many of us accept them as FACT. They aren’t fact though – they are merely a person’s perception of something which then becomes a belief. For every belief you hold, I am sure I could find someone somewhere, or an example somewhere that would refute that belief and put you right back a square one.
We all amass belief as we go through life, it makes life easier as we begin to make sense of the world and discover what feels true for us. The important thing to remember is that most beliefs, if not all beliefs, can and should be challenged every so often.
Ask yourself questions like:
Does this belief still hold true?
Where/ Who is the source of this belief?
Does this belief serve me well or does it act as a hindrance?
How can I reframe this belief to serve me better?
Beliefs come from many different sources – our parents, teachers, peer group, significant others, the media etc
Often without realizing, it we incorporate certain beliefs into our psychological make up that end up toxic to us and limit us in our endeavours.
For example: If you were constantly told as a child that you needed to try harder and that your school work was never quite good enough, you may end up with an erroneous belief that you are stupid or incapable. This is definitely a belief that serves no purpose and is outdated. In all likelihood, your parents had their own dysfunctional issues about achievement and success and projected this on to you. As an adult, it is now time to reject this old school thinking and make new rules/beliefs for yourself that work for you not against you.
The first step in eliminating limiting self beliefs is to realise that they are just thoughts, NOT fact. You can choose what to believe about yourself. You do not have to accept other people’s version of you. You decide who you are. Full Stop. Stop listening to those limiting self beliefs and ask yourself what this type of thinking will cost you in life if you continue to let these toxic thoughts reside in your mind.
It will take time and you may never fully eradicate limiting self beliefs but just being aware that they are there and that you have the power to choose your beliefs and thoughts is the first step to claiming back your confidence.
Mandy X
Author: Mandy Kloppers
Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.
