“You can’t change what’s going on around you until you start changing what’s going on within you.” ~Zig Ziglar

Tips for tough times

Tough times pass – keep perspective

Don’t panic – keep calm. Sometimes life circumstances can seem overwhelming and a desperation sets in. Sit quietly, breathe deeply and remember that one thing in life is guaranteed and that is change. This works in your favour when you feel really low as the only way forward must be up!

2. Acceptance and stillness

Sometimes it’s for the best to slow down and take time out for yourself instead of trying to control and fix. There are times when sitting back and focusing on ourselves, building our inner resilience is the best action to take. Stop resisting and accept – this does not mean giving up but it also means that stillness can be a blessing and that it can bring us greater perspective if we stop, take no action and let things evolve naturally for a while before deciding what to do next.

3. Focus on what you can control

Do a little each day on the things that you have control and influence over. For me, that’s trying to eat healthily and improve the amount of exercise I do, The more I look after myself, the more content I feel. Focusing on the actions of others to help me feel better often leaves me feeling vulnerable so I do my best to work on and action those small things each day that bring me a sense of empowerment.

4. Energy flows where your attention goes

Monitor what you focus on. Try not to over think things or focus on problems that may never occur (“what if” type thinking). Watch your self talk and ensure that your ‘mental diet’ is helpful rather than unhelpful.

Example: unhelpful thought: My life is never going to improve

Helpful thought: I may be unhappy now and feel there is no hope but I can’t predict the future and there could be good times ahead.

5. Keep the faith

Don’t give up. Learn self compassion during the tough times. Don’t beat yourself up over perceived mistakes. We all find ourselves in situations that test us – situations that we never ever imagined we would have to face. See each tough time as a lesson, it might be presenting itself to teach you something. Use to become wiser and stronger.

Mandy X

Author: Mandy Kloppers

Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.