Unrequited Love

When love
When love isn’t returned

It hurts like hell when the person you have fallen for does not feel the same way about you. Unfortunately, it is a common occurrence so what can you do to ease the pain and move forward with your life?

1) Be philosophical

There may be a grander plan for all of us and perhaps, just perhaps, things happen for a reason. It is possible that the person who doesn’t love you back isn’t meant to. There might be another person better suited for you that is still making their way to you.

2) Acceptance

You can’t force another to have feelings that they do not possess. This is impossible. The feelings are either there or they aren’t. You cannot influence, nag or persuade someone that just doesn’t feel the same way you do. It is wasted energy and will only leave you feeling more upset.

3) Focus on what you can control

You control your reactions. You cannot control others. Focus on you and what you can do to pick yourself up again. Distract yourself, go out..do things. Believe that there is a world out there waiting for you to embrace it. We can become obsessed by the object of our desire and become blindsided. Focus elsewhere..open up your mind to opportunities.

4) Watch your inner chatter

Make sure that you are still talking to yourself in a positive manner. Just because someone doesn’t want to be with you does NOT mean that there is something wrong with you. You are great, it’s you and that specific person that don’t fit together. You are still perfect as you are. Talk to yourself in a positive manner. For example “it is their loss because I am great and I have a lot of good qualities to offer” instead of “if they don’t love me, no body will…”

5) Try not to dwell

Think about the future instead of going over the past and how things could have been. Don’t engage in “if only…” talk. Think about the positives of your life without this person. Think about their negative points in order to help you move forward and let go. A chapter may have closed but there will be many more new and exciting chapters if you allow yourself to think of the possibilities that lie ahead.

 

Mandy X

 

Mandy Kloppers
Author: Mandy Kloppers

Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.

Mandy Kloppers

Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.

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